Pink Power Ranger turned "Felicity" foil Amy Jo Johnson swats flies genetically engineered for the express purpose of turning self-absorbed, thirtysomething sellouts into zombified homicidal maniacs. Innumerable reasons to root for the CGI swarms multiply during the 20 minutes of mind-numbing hipster banter that pass BEFORE the first nubile body gets snatched (skinny dipper Nahanni Johnstone). "Star Trek" flyboy Robert Duncan McNeill, who appears to have adopted Bill Shatner‘s Ring Ding Diet, plays hero alongside an ever-panting Amy Jo as they battle dubious cellular service, charbroil the mug of one suddenly surly cohort and dodge comical punches from the decapitated body of another. Sure it’s a lame retread, but it’s tough to discount a flick that exposes the devastative power of Trio‘s "Da Da Da." Two breasts. Six corpses. Killer bug cam. Gratuitous urination. Rubber crowbar to the skull. Gratuitous Monica Lewinsky ref. Geeked-out dancing. Gratuitous Eddie Money tracks. Conspiracy theorists just don’t get respect, "When you’re done jerking off on the Grassy Knoll, can we figure a way out of this thing?!"
