On the fuzzy heels of his gloriously gooey CineSchlocker fave Spiders, budding creature auteur Gary Jones proves, like the great Tobe Hooper before him, that it’s REAL easy to lay a crocodile egg.
This outing, bank robbers hijack a party plane headed for Acapulco that meets further misfortune when it’s clobbered by lightening and conveniently pancakes in a SWAMP so treacherous the natives named it after Beelzebub himself. At a half-hour into the flick, this crash is mighty fortuitous for our toothy main attraction who draws the survivors’ celebration to a ferocious halt by CHOMPING their shreiking pilot. The aforementioned toughs (led by Darryl Theirse) hastily ventilate this offending beastie in a hail of lead that scatters croc handbags in all directions. Our heroic stewardess (Heidi Noelle Lenhart) and pals are then forced to haul the bad guys’ ill-gotten bounty through miles of icky swampage at gunpoint until another, BIGGER critter comes a-looking for vengeance one human combo meal at a time.
CineSchlockers should avoid groping for connections to the original. There ain’t any. Except for the recycled love-on-the-rocks plot device and how charmingly cheesy the motionless, phony croc looks being pulled through the water, especially compared to the brilliantly-absurd acrobatics of its CGI sibling.
No breasts. 21 corpses (plus an ill-fated 737 jet). Killer creature cam. Gratuitous slow mo. Multiple gun battles. Mickey slipping. Copter gobbling. Gratuitous Mexican standoff — IN — Mexico. Wisearce lawyer foolishly sasses heavy with RITE and LEFT tattooed (a.k.a. magic markered) on his knuckles, "I take it you took the SHORT bus to school, my friend!"