Also see The Films of Andy Sidaris
Also see Interview: Andy Sidaris
Writer/director Drew Sidaris continues the family formula under Andy’s watchful eye. The flick opens in 1865, with a daring Confederate capture of Union gold. Hence "Enemy Gold." Meanwhile, in contemporary Dallas, Becky Midnite (Suzi Simpson) joins fellow agent and sometime bunk buddy Chris Cannon (Bruce Penhall) on a less than by-the-book coke bust. An exploding crossbow melee later, they’re put on disciplinary leave, and join Mark Barriere on a camping trip in search of that legendary stash of yankee loot. Rodrigo Obregon slithers into the picture as a vengeful Bolivian drug lord so perturbed by the meddling federal do-gooders that he enlists a towering assassin code named "Jewel Panther" (Julie Strain) to erectify, er, rectify matters. Drew’s actually got himself a shockingly comprehensible plot here, punctuated by drool-worthy gratuity by Suzi and her Washington spymaster Tai Collins. Tragically, neither of the ladies returned to the franchise. But snuggled among the copious bonus material is an interview in which buxom Ms. Simpson tells how she landed the role and beams about the joys of strippin’ nekkid in DECEMBER for a (glorious) outdoor shower scene.
Notables: 10 breasts. 34 corpses. Cocaine-stuffed watermelon. Exploding chopper. Hand licking. Catfighting. Diddling. Gratuitous Civil War reenactment.
Quotables: Santiago’s goons clearly have too much time on their hands, "You better be nice to me our I’ll tell Uncle Jessie what you did to that chicken last night!" Ms. Strain emotes, "I’m suffering from a bad case of PMS! I wouldn’t try my patience if I were you!"
Time codes: Ms. Simpson slips into something more deadly (11:05). "Let’s hit the Jacuzzi!" (21:20). Panther slings a sword around while performing a fireside interpretative dance in black leather S&M ware (1:04:52). Suzie and Julie mix it up (1:21:25).