Reviews

Witchbabe: The Erotic Witch Project III

WitchbabeSeduction Cinema explores the salacious origin of its Erotic Witch in this prequel to their 1999 breakthrough hit spoof.

Ultra-scrumptious Laurie Wallace, who played Katie in the original, returns as Diane the sexually frustrated wife of Bacchusville’s closet-case mayor (John P. Fedele) in the not-so-swinging 1800s. That’s until carnally-liberated Helena (Paige Richards) spies Diane self-gratifying in the woods and the two become fast friends.

In fact, Helena makes friends REAL easy, maybe it’s because she slinks around in black fetishware spouting stuff like "You can’t possibly know the secrets of the universe if you don’t even know your own body!" Which easily segues into giving impromptu lessons in Sapphic ecstasies to timid, but eager pupils such as bathing beauties Misty Mundae and Ruby LaRocca.

The seductive charms of this Erotic Witch are SO infectious that the entire village eventually finds itself knotted up in an all-night orgy. Even in the present, CineSchlocker faves Darian Caine (who starred in the previous two flicks) and Debbie Rochon spiral helplessly into uncontrollable fits of lust and wantonly paw each other after merely leafing through Diane’s recently-discovered diary. Such liaisons in varied combinations punctuate about a third of the total running time, while the rest is comprised of mostly fruitless stabs at comedy, especially those much too reliant on lispy homosexual caricatures. There IS, however, a riotous gag between Ms. Wallace and Kimbo the peeping ape.

18 breasts. One corpse. Advanced lesbian tongue rasslin. Drooling. Guy in a gorilla suit. Chicken whacking. Sheriff Cromwell (Michael R. Thomas) addresses the leering press, "I will personally string you up by your ankles! Slit you from your Adam’s apple to your DOODLE and bugger your SPLEEN!!! … I’ll be damned if I’m gonna see Bacchusville’s woods being turned into a masturbation haven AGAIN!!!"